Embarkment 2577 Page 19

  She patted my head. How humiliating. “My mother taught me a lot of human lore. I thought of calling him Shiva the Destroyer, but I decided to go with Cain. It fits much better with Adam and Eve.”

  Cain. The first murderer who killed his brother. Not good.

  “It’s still the same old body. I bet you’ve said something in the likes of for better or for worse, and this is certainly for the worse. Pleading to him won’t do you any good. If your husband is still in there somewhere he’s too far away to help you. Or, well, go ahead and plead all you want. It will be amusing.”

  “What did you do to him?” At least my voice was returning. Just in time to have my throat ripped off by my husband’s hands…

  “Nothing much. Adam was resistant to reprogramming so I created a new persona.” She turned to leave. “Have fun, brother.”

  “What do you want me to do with her?”

  He sounded just like Adam. Dying by my beloved’s hands seemed worse than being killed by a stranger.

  Eve laughed. “Whatever you want.”

  I stepped away from him, but he closed the space between us with a couple of long strides. “Adam, if you can hear me, I want you to know I love you very much.”

  Cain lifted my hand and examined it. He pinched too hard. “Oww, don’t do that.”

  Stupid. He squeezed harder, of course, until something gave way. “Oww!”

  “Interesting. Humans are fragile.”

  He poked my right breast with a finger, almost curiously, but hard. “That really hurts.”

  “Squishy.”

  He sounded like a child. Were they all mentally challenged to start with, or had Eve overlooked something? Either way, if he intended to investigate all of me in this fashion before killing me, the torture would take a long time.

  Cain grabbed my upper arms and lifted me right up. For a bizarre moment I wondered if he wanted to look under my foot to see if there might be an expiration date stamped there.

  “Humans are too light. You need higher density to be sturdy.”

  He tossed me to the hard floor, and the impact with the cement knocked the wind out of my lungs. It also sent a blazing wave of pain through my already bruised body. I heard someone moan in agony, and it took several seconds to realize it was me.

  The light above me was much too bright, until the shadow of the man fell upon me. “Adam… Cain… You are your own person, you can make your own decisions, and you don’t have to do this.”

  He crouched next to me and looked at me for a long moment. “Adam is dead. He was weak.”

  “No… He wasn’t weak. He was kind and wonderful.”

  “You meant a lot to him. I wonder why.”

  Cruel words. Cain’s hands ripped my clothes apart as if they were made of paper. I kicked him and he caught my foot. The struggle was futile, of course. No human could hit him hard enough to make a difference.

  *****

  I was a science experiment just as doomed as a worm in a classroom filled with middle school children. Cain’s curiosity knew no limits, and when he finally lost interest in me, I lay naked and bleeding on the floor. The remains of my clothes might provide some comfort, but I was too weak to crawl over to them. Darkness closed in and I didn’t have the will to even try to stay conscious.

  I don’t know how long I was out, but I woke up feeling worse than ever, shivering with fever. I coughed, and ended up with a mouth filled with blood. It was bright red and bubbly, almost festive. It would all be over soon. Pain like this could never last.

  A shoe poked me, turning me over on my back.

  “Stubborn creature. She’s still alive.”

  “Kill me and get it over with.” I could barely hear my own words.

  The voice ordered, “Finish her off. At this point it’s an act of mercy. We can pity the animals, as long as we don’t get attached to them.”

  A long shadow fell over me and I struggled to keep my eyes open, trying to get the face into focus. It was Adam’s, but it held no hope. Adam was dead and his body just a shell, possessed by the cruel stranger. With any luck I’d see him again on the other side.

  Cain lifted a weapon and tilted his head as he looked down the barrel, down at my pitiful body. The female voice sounded impatient. “What are you waiting for? We have things to do.”

  Maybe I already died and went to hell. Maybe I was condemned to suffer eternally at the hands of my lover. Humiliation and agony like this could hardly exist in the real world.

  The face hovering above me frowned. With my luck, he might decide it would be interesting to see how long I could stay alive. “Shoot me.”

  He blinked a couple of times and moved with lightning speed. I heard the weapon discharge and expected more pain followed by oblivion, but nothing happened. It didn’t matter. It shouldn’t take me long to die on my own.

  I heard strange sounds in the distance and saw Cain lower the weapon. He looked down at me for a second before turning around and disappearing out of view.

  Minutes ticked away, and my heart still beat strong. Letting go would be prudent, but my mind clung to consciousness, and I heard each breath rasp in my throat.

  After a thousand years, or maybe ten minutes, the door opened again and Cain returned. A part of me expected more abuse, but an even bigger part didn’t care anymore. His face was unemotional, but he swept a blanket around me.

  “Adam?” My voice was barely a croak. He didn’t answer, but the other one would hardly bother with a blanket. The sight of a naked woman covered in bruises and caked blood wouldn’t bother him.

  He took a seat on the floor next to me and held me up with one arm while pressing a little cup with water against my lips. I couldn’t drink. I rested my head against his chest; I wasn’t strong enough to support myself.

  He put the mug on the floor and ran a hand over my hair. There wasn’t anything to say. I would die feeling somewhat safe, and this was a time to be grateful for the little things in life.

  I think we were equally surprised when his radio crackled and a voice said, “Bell to Commander Adam, can you hear me?”

  He got to his feet, scooping me up in his arms. “I’m here. Two to teleport directly to sickbay.”

  Chapter Three

  Ima stood by a counter preparing some samples, and when we appeared she dropped everything. Medical instruments clattered all over the counter. “What in the galaxies happened to her?”

  “I did.” Adam put me down on a bed, very carefully. I tried to hold on to him, wanted to ask him to stay, but I was too weak. He pressed his lips lightly against my forehead and disappeared.

  Ima’s tail gave her irritation away. “How difficult can it be not to get a woman killed repeatedly?”

  She ran over to me and pulled a console down. I felt something cold against my neck, and that was the last I knew of the world for days.

  When I opened my eyes again, Anya sat by the side of the bed, holding my hand. “Welcome back.”

  I wasn’t in pain anymore. I didn’t exactly feel fine, but it was much better. “What happened? Where’s Adam?”

  Ima came over and stared into my eyes. “Don’t tell me you have amnesia again. You have a very bad habit of getting into trouble.”

  My voice wasn’t strong, but it carried. “I remember. Is he alright?”

  Ima’s tail wagged, betraying her irritation. She roamed around the room, slammed drawers, and tossed things from counter to counter. Anya lifted an eyebrow and shook her head.

  When Ima finally stopped, she pulled her lips back and showed off her fangs. “If he didn’t outrank me I’d kill him. I still might, I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

  It was probably safe to assume my husband was alive.

  Anya patted my arm. “I’ll tell John you’re awake. He has been asking for you.”

  “Is he okay? Eve shot him.”

  Ima grumbled, “Bloody androids. John is fine. Blake took a shot in the shoulder, but he’s fine. Lieutenant Andrews is dead.”
<
br />   John arrived within minutes. He looked misplaced in the sterile environment and I half expected him to bring a bottle of scotch. Seeing him was a relief; Anya and Ima were great, but he was both solid and human.

  “Here. I found this for you on my ship.”

  He pressed an old-fashioned book into my hands. I hadn’t seen one for so long the paper felt peculiar under my fingers. It too was real, and connected me to the world.

  Ima said, “You’ve seen her, now get out.”

  John made a dismissive gesture and pulled up a chair. He leaned forward, took my hand in a fashion that remind me of Adam, and murmured, “Don’t worry, I’ll keep you safe from the cat woman. She has a temper.”

  “It’s good to see you. I was afraid Eve got you.”

  “No. I’m too mean to be an easy target.”

  Ima poked his shoulder. “I have some work to do. Don’t upset my patient.”

  He made a face and muttered, “Perish the thought.”

  She disappeared into her office and John sighed. When he let down his guard, he looked old and tired, and I had to ask, “Are you okay?”

  “That’s a funny question coming from someone in a sickbed. You’ve been out for three days.”

  “Are you serious?” Of course he was. “No one tells me anything. What happened? Where’s Adam?”

  My father in law made a grimace. “Who knows. Bridge, brig, your guess is as good as mine.”

  “Eve?”

  “Don’t know. Megalomaniac bitch got away.”

  I squeezed his hand. Eerily, it felt like my husband’s. “Please find him.”

  He cupped both his hands around mine. “Are you sure? I know Eve tried to delete his programming and put another person in there. He’s not… himself.”

  “I need to see him.”

  “Okay.”

  He stayed with me until Ima threatened to call security and have him thrown out.

  I wanted to go home, but Ima wouldn’t hear of it. When night fell, she said, “I’ll be on stand-by duty, so if anything happens, just call me. Want me to place a guard outside?”

  To protect me from whom? Adam? Eve? “No. No guards.”

  As soon as she dimmed the lights and left, I saw shadows move. A machine ticked further into the room. Was the sound covering someone trying to sneak up on me? Fear of the dark was an understatement.

  No one lurked in the corners or just outside the door, I knew this. Knowing wasn’t the same thing as feeling.

  I was starting to hyperventilate and forced myself to breathe slowly. I only managed because I wouldn’t be able to hear footsteps if my own breathing remained so loud.

  Company would help, but the radio by the door seemed so far away. I wasn’t healed by far, and walking all the way to the door was a superhuman task.

  If something evil lurked in the shadows, it might be safer to stay in bed. Should I hide under the bed? Oh lord, maybe something else hid under there?

  When Anya ran in through the door, I sat up in bed, weeping, rocking, and hugging myself. She threw her arms around me and I clung to her.

  “Ssch, Alex, it’s okay.”

  The panic attack dissolved quickly when I wasn’t alone. “How did you know?”

  “Oh silly girl, I’m keeping my sixth sense on you. Ima can heal your body, but mental scars need time.”

  I nodded mutely, more grateful for her presence than I could say.

  “Look, I can’t even begin to understand what you’re going through, but you need some rest.”

  Closing my eyes terrified me. Going to sleep seemed impossible.

  “I wish Adam was here.” I missed his calm and his strength, but maybe I would have been afraid of him too.

  She climbed up beside me in bed. “He’s not doing so good, honey. It will take some time before he can face you.”

  “But…”

  “He has asked to be taken off duty, but the Captain says no. I know John looked for him all day, but he’s good at staying away. Jia’Lyn says he still doesn’t seem right, but… I don’t know. You know he loves you. He needs time.”

  Time… Maybe I did too. If he were to step through the door this very second, would I run for my life, or go toward him?

  “Do you want me to call Ima and get something to help you sleep?”

  “No…” I didn’t want any more people troubled because of me.

  “I can transfer to the mainframe and stay here tonight.”

  A voice sounding just like Adam’s came from the door. “You need to charge your transmitter. I’ll stay.”

  My heart leaped with hope and fear, and when John stepped into the light I didn’t know if I should cry or be relieved. How long had he waited by the door?

  *****

  John slept in sickbay for over a week. Every time I woke with night terrors, he was there.

  “You don’t have to stay here with me.”

  He flashed a smile. “Yes I do. You’re my little girl.”

  “We’re the same age.” Both his laughter and his words warmed my heart.

  It was almost like having my husband there, but without the potential terror of Caine. If Adam had been human, he would have been John. Very confusing, and comforting.

  When I finally returned home, I knew my husband hadn’t been there. No one had since the day we were taken. I picked up the pieces of a crushed vase and threw a mug with molded coffee in the trash.

  A steady stream of people came by to see me, but I was still lonely. The rooms were the same as always, but large and cold in a way I never experienced before. Adam had been by my side every day for so long I didn’t know how to live without him.

  I feared the night. I could live with being alone in daytime, but in the dark… Maybe I could call Anya or John and ask for company, but that seemed so needy. They’d already spent so much time on me.

  Just after nine, the doorbell rang and my father-in-law stepped in, followed by my best friend. Oh my God, was Anya my mother now?

  They sat down, one on each side of me, and pretended they weren’t checking up on me.

  “You two are so sweet.”

  John bounced a little on my sofa. “I could sleep very well on this.”

  He did, but not so well he didn’t notice when I needed him.

  Every time I left the room, I worried Adam would come by when I wasn’t there. A part of me knew he wouldn’t come home, but I still agonized over missing an opportunity to talk to him.

  After a few days I gave up on waiting and decided on a more proactive course of action. I roamed around the ship, hoping to run into him. Anya hadn’t exaggerated. He was good at staying away.

  One day it happened anyway. I was in the lift, and when it stopped and the doors slid open, Adam stood outside. I wanted to jump into his arms, but he spun around and walked down the corridor.

  I ran after him. “Adam, wait!”

  He didn’t even slow down.

  “You can’t run away from me forever.”

  “Maybe not, but I can try.”

  Why? How did everything go so wrong so quickly? Maybe my friends were right and he had become someone else, a handsome, unreachable stranger.

  “Do you have any idea how much you’re hurting me right now? Stop behaving like such an ass and listen.”

  I thought only the walls paid attention, but he paused and ran a hand over his face. “What do you want?”

  “I love you. I want you to come home. This is just… it’s silly.”

  He shook his head and panic crept up inside. We hadn’t even seen each other for weeks. My heart pounded and my palms were sticky. I wanted to dry them on my jeans, but that would give away how nervous I was. What more could I say? How could I convince him?

  They icy sensation in my chest spread to my voice. “You know, if you don’t love me anymore, there are easier ways to get rid of me. You could just tell me you don’t want me and I’ll move out. You can get a divorce, I’m sure they exist in this century too. This is just really… chil
dish, and painful.”

  Understatement. He was breaking my heart.

  “You know that’s not it. I just, I can’t…”

  He walked away and I couldn’t stop him. “Please come home.”

  I didn’t expect him to, and he didn’t.

  *****

  If I obsessed over Adam before seeing him, the brief encounter made it worse. As long as he wasn’t there I could pretend everything would be alright if he showed up. In more introspective moments I worried I might be more afraid of him than of being alone.

  Had he been aware of what Cain did? Seen his hands hurt me? Felt my bones crack under his fingers? That would be hard to handle.

  I cried on John’s shoulder. He hated it, I could tell, but took it stoically and patted my head until Anya showed up.

  Days went by and I collected gossip. Someone said Adam requested to be transferred to another ship. Blake allegedly answered, “Request denied. You need to go home and face your problems, just like everyone else has to do. That is an order.”

  He didn’t, of course.

  Had Eve been right? Was a relationship between an android and a human doomed to fail? I was frail, emotional, and aging. Maybe I lived in a dream. Maybe Adam had seen the futility in us.

  One day when I came home, a security detail stood outside the door. They all left room for me to pass, and someone said, “Ma’am.”

  Now what? I didn’t recognize any of them. I shifted my weight from foot to foot and the man closest to me said, “You can go in, ma’am.”

  Fleeing would probably be cowardice. I should go forward.

  The door opened to show Jia’Lyn’s back. She didn’t turn around, but a few of her snakes watched me. Adam sat in the sofa with his hands resting on his lap.

  “Someone tried to jump ship. Desertion is a serious violation, and your husband will spend a few days in house arrest. Okay with you, Alex?”

  “Yes. Of course. Thank you.” Thanking her might not be the most appropriate phrase, but I meant it with all my heart.

  “Commander, you will submit yourself to counseling. I will schedule an appointment for you today. You are not to leave these rooms under any circumstances.”