Embarkment 2577 Page 24

  Holding my hand very carefully, he smiled. “Yes, I can.”

  “Wanna tell me what happened to you?”

  He ignored my question and reached over to touch my hair. “Maybe I should call for Ima? You don’t have to go there; she can come here.”

  “No. You heard her. I’ll live.”

  The look on his face was very close to human exasperation, but he dropped the subject. “Can I get you anything?”

  I shook my head a little and closed my eyes, just meaning to blink. When I woke up again, the room was dark and I was alone. The pillow next to me held a little note, written on real paper. “I love you. Call me if you need anything. /A”

  “Computer, what time is it?”

  “It is 01.47.”

  I decided to get up and fetch a glass of water. With any luck at all, the replicator would let me have it and not give me some undrinkable slush.

  Chapter Ten

  I woke from Adam pressing his fingers against my neck, feeling my pulse. “Why am I on the floor?”

  The human half of his face looked worried. “You tell me.”

  I struggled to sit up and he supported me with the metal arm behind my back.

  “I think I wanted water. What time is it?”

  “It’s two thirty. I wanted to check in on you.”

  Fourty minutes gone. Not good.

  “Come here, sweetheart. Time to go back to sickbay.”

  “They can’t do anything anyway.”

  “Maybe not, but they can at least keep an eye on you so you don’t die on me.”

  He scooped me up in his arms and the time to protest was clearly over. “You’ll come see me, right?”

  “Alex…”

  He sat down on the sofa with me still in his arms, fixing his remaining eye on me. “I wanted to come for you. You have no idea how much I’ve worried. I’m still worried.”

  Compared to what he must have been through, I really shouldn’t whine, but I had to tell him something. “For a moment, I thought John was you. I was so disappointed.”

  A shadow of a smile flew over his face. “I get off my shift in three and a half hours. I’ll be there. I promise.”

  I snuggled my head against him. “If you don’t come I won’t have sex with you for months.”

  He laughed. “Fair enough, but I’m not worried, because I’ll be there.”

  There were enough people still in sickbay after Eve’s attack to warrant a nurse on night duty. The brightly yellow alien yelped when she saw us. Adam was quite a sight.

  He put me down on a bed, explaining what happened, and the alien ran webbed fingers over my wrist. “I’m Nurse Isaac. You’re Alex, right?”

  It was a matter of seconds before Adam got in her way. “Commander, please try to stay to the side. I have the situation under control, and perhaps it would be best if you returned to the bridge.”

  A sympathetic ripple flowed through her thick skin. “I’ll take care of her.”

  He took my hand, pressed the remains of his lips against it, and placed it on my chest. I wanted to reach for him or call him back, but Isaac mumbled, “Let him go, honey. He has a job to do and I need to do mine.”

  Something touched my neck and I entered a dreamless darkness.

  The next time I opened my eyes, I lay on a soft bed in a small room. Adam sat to the side, toying with a data pad.

  “Hey handsome.”

  He glanced up. “Now, that’s flattery. You got your own room because Ima says I scare the patients.”

  I wanted to laugh, but didn’t have enough air. I reached my hand out for him instead. “When do you get your new… parts?”

  “It’s not a priority. We have to fix the ship and the people first.”

  I understood what he meant, but it still seemed unfair. “Thank you for being here.”

  He looked at the data pad. “Would you like to hear about the Bourne Identity?”

  “Robert Ludlum. Yes, I would.”

  *****

  Ima’s face hung over me. “Welcome back.”

  I glanced around the room, and didn’t recognize anything. “What happened?”

  “You had surgery, remember? We are on GA118 and thank the galaxies you’re awake. Your android is driving me crazy.”

  “I want a Happy Meal. And a toy.”

  “I don’t know what those are, but I gave you a heart. Isn’t that enough?”

  She looked tired. “Ima, it’s the best anyone has ever done for me, and you did it twice.”

  “Now, you will lie on this stretcher and be rolled back to the ship, and you will stay in sickbay at least until tomorrow. After that, I don’t want to see you in my professional role again. As a friend, hopefully every day. As a doctor, no.”

  Once everyone was convinced I wouldn’t fall down dead, I could return home. Adam still looked like something out of a bad movie. I had asked him so many times what happened and he always changed the subject, I didn’t expect him to answer this time either.

  “She wanted to change me. She thought it would be easier with you out of the picture.”

  Did it work? The question burned on my lips, but was too blunt to be spoken out loud. I touched his ruined face instead. “Does it hurt?”

  As long as he’d had to go around like this, I sincerely hoped the answer would be no.

  “It did at the time. She did that on purpose, of course. There are perks to being a machine; I don’t feel it anymore.”

  I didn’t understand. How would tearing his coverings off help turn him to her cause?

  He explained in a dry voice, “She wanted to remind me of my true origin, show me how little I have in common with humans.”

  It sounded like there had been more to it, but I probably didn’t want to know. He didn’t put much emotion into the words, just recapitulated events, but still made me shudder. I snuggled into his arms and buried my face against his chest. He fell silent and entangled the uncovered fingers in my hair.

  “Alex, I have to tell you something.”

  Uh-oh. Was there something even more horrible? He had avoided the subject for so long I expected the worst. “What’s that?”

  What would be worse: knowing whatever it was he wanted to say, or letting my imagination make things up?

  “I slept with her.”

  It was tempting to imagine the mechanical siblings taking a nap together. “What did you say? You what?”

  “I had to. It was the only chance to get close enough to…”

  I shook his hands off and bounced to my feet. “I don’t believe this. I’ve been kidnapped, almost raped, shot, and nearly died from a heart attack. Meanwhile, you were off cheating with another life form? You know, they told me you wouldn’t come for me, but this?”

  “But…”

  “John told me you couldn’t come for me because you had other things to do. I didn’t expect those other things to be exploring your sexuality with other women.”

  “It wasn’t like that. Not at all.”

  “That’s it. You’re leaving. Get out.”

  A part of me couldn’t believe the words that left my mouth. This was the same person who drove the medical chief to the brink of sanity with his worries for me.

  “Alex, it was the only way I could save the ship.”

  “Fine. If you’re not going, I am.”

  “Alex!”

  I didn’t turn back.

  I didn’t know where to go. Instinct told me to seek out Anya and John, but that would be a really bad idea. Partly because they’d already done so much for me and deserved some time alone, and partly because John looked too much like Adam.

  The guest rooms didn’t seem tempting. It was late and I was too low and angry to want to be all alone. My feet carried me to Jia’Lyn, and I hesitated for only a second before ringing the doorbell.

  “Alex, what’s wrong?”

  I threw my arms around the tall alien. “Can I stay with you tonight?”

  “Of course, but…”


  She shook her head and led me inside, made me sit down, and handed me a mug filled with sweet smelling tea.

  “What happened?”

  I clutched the mug and answered in a half sob. “Nothing much. Seems like my husband found time to have an affair with his sister while I was getting beaten, shot, and almost raped.”

  She rarely showed surprise, but that made her eyes round as saucers. “Adam?”

  “Mmhm.”

  “But… That makes no sense. He told you this?” She didn’t wait for me to answer. She fetched some blankets and a pillow. “Try to get some rest and we’ll talk in the morning.”

  “Thank you.”

  She wasn’t generally a touchy-feely kind of person, but she rested a hand on my shoulder. “I don’t know what happened, but Adam loves you. He tolerates everyone else, but he loves you. Good night, Alex.”

  It was one of the many things I loved about her; she kept her cool and stayed neutral. It was exactly what I needed.

  Thoughts churned in my mind. I should probably be happy he wanted to be completely honest, and maybe I should have stayed to hear him out. Still, during all the time we’d known each other, he hardly even looked at another woman. If a supermodel walked by him stark naked, he would offer her his shirt.

  Stunningly beautiful women hit on him all the time, sometimes literally threw themselves over him. He generally looked weary and asked why.

  This matter with Eve was not a small thing. Maybe his base programming was changing. Maybe Eve had succeeded, dead or not.

  I had expected him to follow me, apologize, and carry me home whether I wanted to come or not, but he just sat there and watched me go. Maybe he didn’t want me anymore.

  I stared up at the ceiling for hours. Good thing I’d slept enough for a life time while I was sick. Good thing Adam stalled telling me until after the surgery. A day earlier, this would have killed me. Imagine Ima’s wrath if he had shown up carrying my dead body, telling that story.

  *****

  The next morning, Jia’Lyn made me eat breakfast and I told her what really happened. Her sober attitude and the new day made everything seem even more surreal.

  “You said he slept with her. Why would he do that?”

  “What do you mean why?”

  “Sweetheart, we’re talking about Adam. He’s not… you know… like other people.”

  I made a dismissive gesture. “It sounded like he had some form of explanation, but I didn’t stay to hear it.”

  “The only thing that sounds like Adam in all this is telling you about it. Maybe she disabled his ethics circuits or something?”

  “Maybe he just realized he liked her. She was built for him to love, you know.”

  She sighed. “You’re welcome to stay here as long as you want to, but you’ll have to talk to him eventually.”

  I swallowed a sob, “I know, but not today.”

  She needed to go to work and I was too restless to sit there all alone. I roamed around the ship, hoping I wouldn’t run into anyone. Eve’s crew really did a lot of damage. Several floors were remodeled. I couldn’t understand the purpose of the changes, but it probably made sense to a crazy android…

  My new scars hurt and I should probably take it easy, give my body more time to heal, but I couldn’t. I saw a couple of ensigns working on restoring a computer console. “Hey, you guys need an extra pair of hands?”

  They looked surprised, but showed me what to do. I needed to prove to myself I wasn’t worthless. I needed a value besides being my cheating husband’s wife.

  John came looking for me. I said, “I can’t talk to you right now. I love you, but please go away.”

  He lifted his hands in a pacifying gesture and disappeared. A little while later, Anya appeared next to me. “If you want to talk…”

  “…I know where to find you. Give me a couple of days.”

  I wanted to hug her, but this was just an on-ship hologram and had no substance.

  That night I was so exhausted I actually fell asleep in the safety of Jia’Lyn’s home. I woke early and went back to work. She came to look for me after a couple of hours, leaning her shoulder against a wall. “Guess who came to see me.”

  I muttered, “Cheating bastard.”

  “He is.”

  I didn’t expect her to agree with me.

  “I told him I didn’t want to know what happened, but he told me anyway, of course.”

  “Of course.”

  She made a half-decent Adam imitation. “I betrayed her. I had to. It was the only way to save the ship.”

  “Blah, blah, blah.”

  “I know… Men, right?”

  I expected her to leave, but she kept her gaze fixed on me. “Alex, what are you going to do if you can’t forgive him?”

  “I don’t know.”

  My life on the Bell had come to be because of him, and it was the only thing I knew. I had no other home, nowhere else to go. Blake would probably let me stay, but I couldn’t see me living there without Adam.

  My friend sighed. “You look as despondent as he did.”

  “What did you tell him?”

  “That he did something really bad, that he should ask forgiveness, and count his blessings if you take him back.”

  Good one.

  Chapter Eleven

  My husband came to see me around noon. I stood with my back at him, tearing at some tubes. Eve’s robots left them everywhere and I couldn’t even begin to figure out a reason. I heard Adam approach, and ignored him.

  “I really need to talk to you.”

  I didn’t turn around. I didn’t even turn my head, or acknowledge he was there.

  He took a step closer. “I tried to tell you earlier I had to lure her. She needed to think she had me, be sure of it, or I couldn’t have saved anyone. I’m more sorry than words can say, it was a horrible thing of me to do, but I couldn’t see another way.”

  I glared back over my shoulder. “Oh yeah, and you didn’t enjoy it at all, and you weren’t at all tempted to go with her.”

  My voice oozed with sarcasm and he looked deeply unhappy.

  “I was tempted. It was nice. Not like with you, but nice, and I enjoyed it for several seconds. I’ve felt terrible ever since.”

  If this happened to anyone else, if anyone else even said the same sentence, it would have been comical. “Well, several seconds is a very long time for you, isn’t it?”

  That put him off. He looked helpless, at a loss for words. I must have been right.

  “I have something for you.”

  “Of course you do. It doesn’t matter what century it is, cheating men will always try to buy themselves out of trouble.”

  He put a rather big and shiny metal cranium on the floor between us. “This is all that remains of Eve. I retrieved it from recycling for you. You can destroy it any way you want.”

  That was actually kind of cute. Shooting this to pieces or dipping it in acid would be therapeutic. I tried to scowl, but it was getting harder by the minute.

  Adam came a little closer, just enough to put his hands on my shoulders. “Please remember I love you. And I did kill her.”

  I avoided his one brown eye and glanced down at the shining skull. Why did I long for him when I was so mad I could burst?

  “Please come home. I miss you.”

  He really looked awful. I had forgotten just how bad it was during my stay with Jia’Lyn, but he had gone through a lot. “You will never do anything like this again.”

  “Never.”

  “We will never talk about her again.”

  That demand probably seemed illogical, but he nodded. I think he would have agreed to anything. The very thought of him touching, kissing, holding, making love to another woman made my blood boil. It didn’t matter she was dead; I wanted to kill her. I wanted to hit him, but it was pointless. He’d just wait for the fit to end.

  “If I could make it undone I would. I’d find another way. Nothing like this will ever happen aga
in.”

  My eyes brimmed with tears and he pulled me into his arms, letting me cry it out in peace. “I’m so sorry.”

  It sounded earnest, and he was the worst liar I ever met. I believed him.

  Eventually, he ran his hand over my hair, dried my cheeks off, and kissed my forehead. He was too wise to attempt any closer contact. “I have to go. I will be on the bridge. Please, come home.”

  “Maybe.”

  “I love you.”

  I didn’t want to say it back. I was so angry with him, and everything would be much easier if I could hate him. Having him close was counterproductive; I couldn’t keep the rage burning. “I love you too.”

  When he left, I stood staring at the skull for a few long moments. “I hate you, and I’m glad you’re dead.”

  How could I best destroy it? Melting it might be satisfying. I grabbed it and trotted towards the science laboratories. I knew where they were, but I’d never been there before.

  A young woman with orange hair and white eyes looked up. I smiled and tried to look friendly. No one would help me with hatred flashing on my face. “Hi.”

  “Can I help you?”

  “Oh I hope so. I really need to melt this piece of junk. Some acid or something…”

  She looked interested. “I’m Debana. What is that?”

  I liked her already. “I’m Alex. This is a piece of android skull, and it needs to not be anymore.”

  “The lady android? Can I see that?”

  I shrugged and handed over my treasure. Turning it over in her hands, her eyes shifted colour from white to purple.

  “I wish you had all of her here, so we could melt her alive.” Turning to the skull, she added, “Bitch.”

  So that’s what the look on her face was: loathing. Interesting. “I like the way you’re thinking.”

  Should I ask? I didn’t have to. She seemed to have longed for a sympathetic ear and told me more than I ever wanted to know.

  “Do you know what she did? The other android, our android was down here when she came. We were trying to figure out what that cloud of nanobots did and how to counteract it. Well, she stomped in here, shot my colleague, and said Adam had to give himself up or she’d kill all the meatbags.”